TODAY’S JOURNAL PROMPTS: If my life was a movie and it started today, what would the hero do? What old routines and patterns would the hero break? What new habits would the hero replace those old habits with?
As with all things, I found this challenge much harder the second time around. As I try to get our business up and running, every one of my inner doubts seem to be activated and put on alert. Every time I tried to envision my inner heroine, I was rewarded with all sorts of apocalyptic and post-apocalyptic images to match how I’ve been feeling lately.
Why on Earth would I start a business in the middle of the biggest societal meltdown I’ve ever experienced in my life? What fool does that? I saw images of women, dirty, hair matted, scavengers crawling among the ruins, surviving somehow in the worst of conditions.
Well, yeah, depression can be a wonderful thing when combined with a healthy imagination.
Yesterday, however, I was listening to The Biddy Tarot Podcast on my afternoon commute, and the subject was “The Fastest (and Easiest) Way to Read a Tarot Card.” As Brigit, the host, led the audience through the process of intuiting a one-card reading, I decided to focus on what energy I needed to get my act together on Two Ladies Tarot.
As the Arizona Department of Transportation frowns upon pulling tarot cards whilst driving on state highways, I used Brigit’s tip of letting my intuition provide the card I needed to answer my question.
The image I got was the Lady below–the Empress.
And that’s when I realized why I was having so much trouble with this whole business thing. When I thought about myself as the heroine of this story, I was always stressed. Victimized. Frightened.
But the Empress? Hell, no, she is not a victim. She’s not stressed. Look at her! She’s relaxed, chilling on her throne, surrounded by beauty, peaceful as can be. The Empress is not running around, scattering her energies, chasing after life like a dog begging for scraps.
She has her place and her authority. She is respected, trusted, and beloved.
She is thoughtful, wise, and deliberate. She’s compassionate.
The Empress doesn’t need to struggle, because she knows the universe is eternal, that there is a vast Source of magic and energy she can tap into whenever she needs to, and that she can relax into the understanding that she serves the cause of goodness and healing.
She’s my heroine. She’s the energy I need to channel.
Victim no more, she says. And I listen.